


Something's Missing

by bouquetiere



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: F/M, Genderswap, Nipple Play, a lot of talk about boobies, girl!Niall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-20
Updated: 2012-08-20
Packaged: 2017-11-12 12:58:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/491280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bouquetiere/pseuds/bouquetiere
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For this <a href="http://diagona11y.livejournal.com/4195.html?thread=133987#t133987>prompt</a>:%20">prompt</a>:"girl!niall has always been a little insecure about her small boobs, so she gets implants*. zayn (who can be whatever gender) is thrilled." at the Ziall Ficathon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something's Missing

**Author's Note:**

> I filled this prompt back at the ficathon, but I took forever, so I'm hoping the original prompter sees it here :)  
> My first post to the Archive, and most certainly not my last.

Niall decides to tell Zayn of her decision by catching him off guard. 

They’ve had a busy week with recording, so instead of going out with the boys they opted for a romantic night in. 

(Their idea of romance being smoking a blunt, ordering both a pizza and Chinese food and watching the Man U match against Fulham, all while curled up on their couch, occasionally going burp for burp during commercials.)

The game is in its final half hour when Niall stops running her fingers through Zayn’s hair, his head lying on her chest. “Baby? Can I tell you something?”

Zayn sighs sleepily, sliding his head up to nuzzle into her neck. He tightens his arm around her waist and nods. “Yes ma’am. As long as it has nothing to do with you moving from this spot.”

Niall takes a deep breath, holding it in. “I want to get surgery.”

Zayn’s ears prick up like he’s some kind of dog and he sits up, looking at Niall concernedly. “What’s wrong? Are you ill?” Panic sets in quicker than Zayn would like to admit but this is Niall. She’s more than just a girlfriend. 

“No, no, no I’m fine Zee, I’m fine,” She presses a quick kiss to Zayn’s cheek, her hand rubbing the scruffy spot where her lips had been. “I’m not sick, I…I’ve just been…” Niall looks away, her face reddening. “God, this is embarrassing.”

Zayn tsks, cupping her face in his hands and kissing her softly. “Come off it, you know you can tell me anything. It’s just me. I won’t tell the lads, promise. Just me, love, okay?”

Niall relaxes, leaning in to kiss Zayn again. She rests her forehead against his, sighing. “Yeah. Okay. I, um, I want a boob job.”

Zayn blinks a few times, thinking she’s joking. “Are you taking the piss?”

“What?! No, I’m being serious!” Niall half-heartedly punches Zayn in the arm. “I’m kind of tired of always having to get my dresses pulled in and all the bloody padding and not having anything to push up in a push up bra and…I don’t know,” She cups her small breasts, maybe an A34 if it’s raining out. 

“I want to have boobs. I feel like a part of me is missing. It’s stupid and I should be comfortable in my own skin and feel feminine enough without them, and I do really, but I don’t know Zee I just-“ Zayn silences her with a kiss, a smile on his lips. 

“Ni, you’re perfect the way you are, but if you really want to do this then I’ll be right behind you, I promise.”

Niall’s eyes light up. “D’ya mean it? Really?”

“Of course, love,” Zayn pulls her close for a cuddle, pressing his lips to the pulse on her neck. “ Why wouldn’t I support you getting bigger tits? You’re gonna get bigger tits, my god!” He exclaims, shaking Niall a little and laughing. 

Niall snorts, flicking his face. “Jeez, Zayn, don’t sound too excited. They’re still here for the time being, you tosspot.” 

Zayn shushes her, placing gentle kisses on her nearly flat chest. “Well, I mean I get some enjoyment out of it too. I like your tits a lot as is, but with more to look at and touch, and with your body already…God Ni…you’re right fit. You stop traffic how you are already but if you get bigger knockers,” He wolf whistles, shaking his head. “We’re gonna have to quit the band, I won’t let you leave our bed.”

Niall laughs, the vibrations making Zayn feel warm inside. “Ever the charmer, Zayn Javadd.”

*

When Niall invites the boys over the next day, Harry and Louis poke fun as expected, gutted over not being able to pinch her nipples whenever they please. 

Liam just smiles sweetly and pulls her into a long hug, telling her softly in her ear how much he supports her decision and  _Lou and Haz are just playing, they don’t mean it, I hope you know you’re fit just the way you are_ , and how he’ll help take care of her with Zayn after the surgery. And it’s all so very Liam that Niall starts crying in the midst of everything because Liam is most like a proper brother when Greg can’t be around. Which only causes Louis and Harry to poke more fun even as they all wrap their arms around Niall, swaying her gently, singing “What Makes You Beautiful” (in harmony, of course) to her, as if they don’t tell her every day. As if they don’t tell Zayn all the time how lucky he is to have a girl so chill and so gorgeous. 

Because she is, really, and she knows it, but she just wants this one thing to feel whole.

*

Zayn takes doting boyfriend above and beyond, scheduling their flights to Beverly Hills and taking care of their visas, management and appointments, and doing so much that Niall doesn’t even have to lift a finger when the day comes to finally leave London. 

Liam promises he’ll fly out with Niall’s mum the day of the surgery to help Zayn take care of her, and after she’s healed for a bit, Louis and Harry promise to come too. It’s overwhelming how much everyone cares about  _this_  of all things and Niall finds herself crying from happiness far too often. She’s finally getting what she’s wanted and not being afraid for wanting it anymore is the best feeling.

“Are you still gonna love me after all this is done?” Niall asks suddenly on the drive to the hospital. She had been quiet and passive all morning and Zayn had just let her, just held her hand in the backseat of their car and let her be nervous, because he was too. 

People were going to talk; hell, people had already been talking. Niall could feel the tendrils of backlash coiling around her resolve, threatening to break her down. Zayn knew it, tried to protect her from the hate on Twitter and the tabloids making her to be a joke. It’s gonna blow over, they both know it, but Niall is more on edge today than Zayn has ever seen her.

“I promise I’ll love you no matter what babes,” Zayn coos, reaching over to smooth the blonde bangs from her eyes. “You’re the love of my life, ya idjit.”

Niall manages a small smile and a chuckle. Zayn kisses her a few times and holds her close as the hospital comes into view. “Everything is going to be aces and all the pain is going to be worth it and I’m going to be there, every step of the way, okay?” 

She nods and just buries her face in his neck because she’s crying again. But it’s because she loves him so much it hurts sometimes. And that’s okay, as far as she’s concerned.

*

Zayn doesn’t relax until Niall’s plastic surgeon, a tall, svelte man named Dr. Goldstein, walks into the waiting room with a smile on his face.

“Well?” Zayn tries to not sound so desperate but he fails. WebMD may have opened his eyes to potential complications and he’s bitten his nails down to the stubs since he kissed Niall’s forehead right as the anesthesia took her under.

“She did great, nothing went wrong,” he starts, his hands up defensively. “The size is just what she wanted, an average B36, nothing too big for her frame.”

Zayn exhales for the first time in what seems like days. “Can I see her? Is that okay?”

Dr. Goldstein nods, stepping aside. “Sure, beyond those doors, 3 door on the left. The nurses should be waking her up now, so she’s gonna be out of it.”

Zayn waves off that minor detail and follows his direction to the room, a group of people in scrubs crowded around a bed inside. The shock of wild yellow blonde at the top of the bed puts Zayn at a level of ease that he didn’t know was possible.  _She’s okay_.

“Niall, sweetheart,” one of the nurses, an older woman, says to her as she smoothens her hair down. Her eyes meet Zayn’s over Niall’s sleeping form and she beckons him over towards the bed. “You have a visitor honey, open your eyes for us.”

The other two nurses step aside so Zayn can fit in, finally getting a good look at Niall. She looks a little worse for wear, but Zayn couldn’t care less. The nurses have bundled hospital blankets up over her chest to her neck so Zayn can’t tell of the difference like he expected to.  _There’ll be plenty of time for me to stare once she’s healed_ , he muses.

Niall groans, shaking her head groggily. “Nuh-uh, we sleep now.” Zayn slaps a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing at how little she sounds.

“Come on Ni,” Zayn playfully chides, brushing the back of his hand a few times against her freckled cheek. “Be a good girl, open your eyes for me.”

Niall’s right eye cracks open, fighting the last dregs of anesthesia. “Zaynie? ‘S tha’ you?” Her voice is shot and more Irish now than ever, classic after she’s had too much to drink or hasn’t had a cuppa in the morning.

Zayn chuckles, nodding, pressing a soft kiss to her temple. “Yeah love, it’s me. How are you feeling?

She groans again, her face upturning in a grimace. “Everything hurts Zay, hurts like hell,” She opens both eyes and lifts her head up enough to peer down, disappointed by the sight of the blankets. Her head falls against the pillows and her eyes shut again, clearly gutted. “Baby, how do my tits look? I can’t see them. Do I look good, Zay? Baby, tell me I’m pretty.”

A low chuckle erupts throughout the room but Niall is too high to notice. Zayn kisses her cheek, running a hand through her hair. “We’ll see them soon, Nialler. And you’re gorgeous, honey, you always have been.”

“Mm, such a good boyfriend Zaynie,” She mumbles to herself, nodding absently. “So sweet and a good fuck, I’m just so lucky.”

“Niall Jean! Some tact please, honey. Jesus.” Zayn chastises, his face blushing. The nurses around him are silently cracking up, and Zayn has to laugh too. She’s higher than a kite. 

“Hush babe, every one is jealous of me, I knows it,” Niall slurs, her head lolling to one side. “And now I’ve got tits! I’ve got tits and a Zayn, I’m the Queen of the Universe!”

Zayn rolls his eyes, but he has a smile on his face. _I’m gonna marry her someday._

*

“Are you excited to see them?” Niall asks, squeezing Zayn’s hand in the exam room. After the last 2 weeks of watching Niall in agony, worrying over her not being able to eat, and holding her through the pain until the meds kicked in, seeing her boobs was going to be beyond worth it.

After some awkward shuffling around Dr. Goldstein (you would think, a man that has his livelihood touching tits wouldn’t be so weird when it comes to a conscious woman) Niall is naked from the waist up, and Zayn can’t breathe.

She’s perfect, always has been. But like this, with these… 

“Well?” both the doctor and Niall stare at Zayn expectantly, awaiting a reaction other than his current doe eyed façade. Niall and Zayn lock eyes and Zayn feels his mouth get dry, like he’s the class nerd looking at the hot cheerleader.

He coughs, trying to compose himself, his hands flying to cover his lap. “You’re stunning, Ni. Jesus.” He’s aware of how detached he sounds but it’s taking everything in him to not pin Niall down and take her right here, Dr. Goldstein be damned.

Niall smiles, her face glowing and a glimmer in her eye as the doctor explains to her how the next few weeks will go down. Zayn almost feels a little bad at how happy she seems; he never made her feel this way, he surmises. But if she’s happy with herself, everything else will fall better into place.

*

What WebMD failed to tell Zayn was how someone healing from breast implants can’t have sex (well, engage in strenuous activity) for at least 6 weeks.

If he had known that before the surgery, then maybe dealing with Niall walking around their flat topless would be easier to deal with.

Alas, he didn’t, so he’s sprouting a fresh erection every time the wind blows. He feels like a stupid teenager again, sneaking into the bathroom to rub one out quickly when Niall isn’t looking, waking up with his boxers stuck to his thighs from particularly vivid wet dreams. If Niall has any idea, she’s been good at pretending like her new boobs and her inability to have sex are having no effect on her boyfriend.

When Niall finally gets the go ahead to go back to working out and lifting things almost 2 months to the day after the surgery, like clockwork she gets her period and Zayn almost punches a wall in their bathroom, so sexually frustrated.

He’s been basically counting the seconds until she’s really good to go because the crick in his wrist has really halted…productivity. Zayn invites at least one of the boys over every day for dinner or movies or games, which forces Niall into thankfully putting/keeping a shirt on, and forces Zayn from always having his hand down his pants. 

Zayn realizes though, watching Niall cross in front of the TV wearing a now tight v-neck and short joggers, that even if he did know about this no-sex thing, it’d still be just as hard as it is now, pun completely intended.

*

"Zay? Babe are you alone?” Niall calls from what Zayn assumes to be outside of their bedroom. Liam had just left for a date with Danielle, leaving Zayn to sit on his hands and try to focus on the GB soccer game versus Korea.

“Just me, love.” He shouts back, closing his eyes. Being this wound up is tiring.

“Okay good,” her voice is closer and Zayn opens his eyes, not at all expecting to see her in a lace bra and matching thong. “I wouldn’t want the lads to see me like this…it’s only for you Zay.”

Zayn’s heart crawls up into his throat. She looks like a walking advert for Victoria’s Secret. “Fuck, Nialler. What’s the occasion?”

She giggles, pulling her hair over one shoulder. “I can have sex now, and we haven’t had sex in quite possibly forever and I have yet to properly test drive out my new boobies. So I went out and bought this!” She strikes a little pose, hands on her (since when did Niall have curves?!) hips. Her face falls when Zayn fails to react, again, a bad habit of his. “Do you not like it?”

“No, no, no, oh my God Ni,” He spurts, standing up to close the gap between the two of them. He cups her face in his hands and kisses her softly. “You’re fucking gorgeous, Niall, I can’t stop staring,” He grabs her hand, presses it down over the semi in his joggers. “You do that to me. You always have.”

Niall surges forward to kiss him, pressing her lithe body flush against Zayn’s. Her arms creep up his sides, resting on either side of his neck. “I want you. I want you so badly.”

Zayn groans low in his throat and lifts Niall in his arms, only pausing for her to wrap her legs around his waist. On muscle memory alone he walks them to their room, Niall’s hair curtaining his face, her tongue sliding smoothly alongside his. 

Zayn drops her on the bed, rather roughly, and moves to take his clothes off much to Niall’s amusement. “God, you horny tosser, I’m not going anywhere, you don’t have to rush.”

“I don’t think you know how long it’s been since we’ve fucked, Ni,” he says, kicking off his trainers, shucking his joggers behind them. He climbs on the bed over her prone form, his eyes staring at her lustily. “All I’ve wanted is to be inside of you for weeks, God Niall.” He steals her breath in a kiss and swallows a moan, ready to make her scream.

Deftly Zayn reaches behind her back, and left-handedly unclasps Niall’s bra, smirking as she gasps, breaking their kiss. His eyes rake over her chest and he’s looking at her like he’s starved. “I’m gonna have to get used to these.” He mumbles, not entirely to Niall. He ducks his head down, kisses her between the small gap above where her cleavage would start, dragging a trail of kisses over the mound of her left breast. She looks like she’s had them her whole life, Zayn remarks, realizing how soft and supple and just natural they feel. Niall sucks in a sharp breath that has Zayn looking up concernedly, wondering if she’s still tender in some spots.

"It’s…um, more sensitive,” Zayn brushes the tip of his nose over her areola inquisitively, and she squirms, whimpering. “It never used to be like that.”

“Hmm,” Zayn smirks, his tongue peaking out to outline the pinker skin, a pale line. “Gonna make you come just like this.” He mouths into her flesh, gently taking her nipple into his mouth to her nearly painful cry. “Oh, Zayn.” She manages to choke out before he sucks, his hand coming up to caress it. 

Zayn’s tongue works at her nipple until it’s hard in his mouth and Niall is trembling, arching up, her hands running almost rhythmically through Zayn’s hair. Her legs coil themselves around Zayn’s waist, eagerly trying to rub against any part of his body for some friction before she loses it. 

He doesn’t think twice to wrap his own hand around his cock, mind numbingly turned on by the fact that he’s got Niall writhing from something that never used to turn her on before. He’s almost embarrassed at how into this he is, the noises that she’s making driving him wild, until she fists the sheets up in one hand and squeaks Zayn’s name and he realizes how incredibly hot this is. 

Zayn kisses his way to her other breast, tickling the sides of her nipple with his tongue before eagerly giving it the same treatment, moving his tongue over it like he would if he was between her legs. Just that realization alone, that he can make Niall fall to pieces with his tongue like this gets him closer, his wrist is moving frantically He feels his own orgasm bubble up inside of him too soon but he can’t stop so long as Niall is making these, short whiny noises from the back of her throat. He fights the urge to bite down on her nipple as he moans, coming on her inner thigh, warm and thick. Niall is sobbing, desperate, her pleas coming to a crescendo and Zayn doesn’t let up until she comes, weakly pushing his head away.

Zayn looks up at her, grinning triumphantly. He reaches between her legs and palms tentatively at her cunt, not surprised to find her soaked through her cotton panties. 

“I take it you don’t like them then.” Niall quips sarcastically, her voice breathy, accent dense. He kisses her, moving to pull off her thong before hitching her legs up, cock pressing gently at her pussy, teasing.

“Mmm, not in the slightest, babe.”

 

 


End file.
